Comments on: This Is Why You're Dead And Hard To Fit Into A Coffin http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin Seriously, this could not be more beta Fri, 19 Mar 2010 11:32:07 -0400 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 By: EvilMonkey http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-26150 EvilMonkey Wed, 30 Sep 2009 20:08:15 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-26150 Au contraire. I feel an alternative energy stimulus grant coming on. Au contraire. I feel an alternative energy stimulus grant coming on.

]]> By: EvilMonkey http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-26147 EvilMonkey Wed, 30 Sep 2009 20:05:19 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-26147 Judge ye not... Judge ye not…

]]> By: Bittersweet http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13400 Bittersweet Tue, 14 Jul 2009 16:22:02 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13400 Emily, they thought 'Reaper' and 'Scythe' weren't euphemistic enough. Emily, they thought 'Reaper' and 'Scythe' weren't euphemistic enough.

]]> By: propertius http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13368 propertius Tue, 14 Jul 2009 14:41:34 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13368 Well, that's fine, so long as you understand that Saint Peter is <i>not</i> letting them through the Golden Arches. Well, that's fine, so long as you understand that Saint Peter is not letting them through the Golden Arches.

]]> By: My Number Is My Address http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13334 My Number Is My Address Tue, 14 Jul 2009 10:05:43 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13334 NO LONGER WILL YOUR FAT CHILDREN BE HARD TO SHOP FOR EVEN IN DEATH! It is every American mother's saddest dream. No joke. NO LONGER WILL YOUR FAT CHILDREN BE HARD TO SHOP FOR EVEN IN DEATH! It is every American mother's saddest dream. No joke.

]]> By: Emily http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13331 Emily Tue, 14 Jul 2009 02:56:22 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13331 Harvest is just ... wow. Harvest. HARVEST. Harvest is just … wow. Harvest. HARVEST.

]]> By: alorsenfants http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13312 alorsenfants Mon, 13 Jul 2009 22:14:20 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13312 Guessing that Federal Air Emission standards won't allow for the cremation of these people? Nice! Guessing that Federal Air Emission standards won't allow for the cremation of these people?

Nice!

]]> By: kenlayne http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13306 kenlayne Mon, 13 Jul 2009 21:39:47 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13306 Every man a Pharaoh .... Every man a Pharaoh ….

]]> By: missdelite http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13301 missdelite Mon, 13 Jul 2009 20:59:55 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13301 A place for you AND your demons. A place for you AND your demons.

]]> By: zidaane http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13298 zidaane Mon, 13 Jul 2009 20:33:20 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13298 Or an eight man rowing crew. Or an eight man rowing crew.

]]> By: propertius http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13290 propertius Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:54:17 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13290 When you have a design for its monument, POST A LINK HERE!!! When you have a design for its monument, POST A LINK HERE!!!

]]> By: EvilMonkey http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13288 EvilMonkey Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:47:19 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13288 Nah, tip the coffin up on its end and bury it standing up. Or, for Yoga folks, on its head. Nah, tip the coffin up on its end and bury it standing up. Or, for Yoga folks, on its head.

]]> By: EvilMonkey http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13286 EvilMonkey Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:44:52 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13286 In the "real" America, where you will find "real Americans". And Sarah Palin, too. Also. In the "real" America, where you will find "real Americans". And Sarah Palin, too. Also.

]]> By: Abe Sauer http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13282 Abe Sauer Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:35:29 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13282 Seriously. Stuff a bunch of people in there with you when you go (preferably still-alive virgins) and then you have yourself a TOMB! Seriously. Stuff a bunch of people in there with you when you go (preferably still-alive virgins) and then you have yourself a TOMB!

]]> By: bshep http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13280 bshep Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:30:21 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13280 The names of the caskets (Harvest, Heartland, Homestead) are a good clue as to where you might find that community on a US map. The names of the caskets (Harvest, Heartland, Homestead) are a good clue as to where you might find that community on a US map.

]]> By: FeyBoohoozer http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13279 FeyBoohoozer Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:29:58 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13279 I believe the hinges are reinforced in order to keep the really fat zombies from escaping. I believe the hinges are reinforced in order to keep the really fat zombies from escaping.

]]> By: bshep http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13278 bshep Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:24:36 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13278 from the about us page: In 1985, Keith's father, Forrest Davis, (Pee Wee) quit his job as a welder in a casket factory and said, “Boys, I’m gonna go home and build oversize caskets that you would be proud to put your mother in.” from the about us page:
In 1985, Keith's father, Forrest Davis, (Pee Wee) quit his job as a welder in a casket factory and said, “Boys, I’m gonna go home and build oversize caskets that you would be proud to put your mother in.”

]]> By: My Number Is My Address http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13277 My Number Is My Address Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:18:44 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13277 My two most trusted servants and my best retriever are coming with me. My two most trusted servants and my best retriever are coming with me.

]]> By: propertius http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13275 propertius Mon, 13 Jul 2009 19:13:31 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13275 Looks like the caskets have plenty or room for sacrificial burgers, fries and sodas to accompany the departed. Looks like the caskets have plenty or room for sacrificial burgers, fries and sodas to accompany the departed.

]]> By: CaptainFantastic http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13269 CaptainFantastic Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:55:07 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13269 At last, a way to be buried with two hookers. At last, a way to be buried with two hookers.

]]> By: propertius http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13268 propertius Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:53:42 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13268 You need some sensitivity training, buster. You need some sensitivity training, buster.

]]> By: NotAndersonCooper http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13267 NotAndersonCooper Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:51:14 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13267 Their Urns come in Venti! Their Urns come in Venti!

]]> By: Colonel Mustard http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13265 Colonel Mustard Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:41:09 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13265 The real problem is finding a pallbearer with a license to operate a forklift. The real problem is finding a pallbearer with a license to operate a forklift.

]]> By: Tuna Surprise http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13262 Tuna Surprise Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:12:49 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13262 The cemetary better make them buy two plots for this sucker. I'll be damned to hell before I let some dude's coffin spill over into my final resting place. The cemetary better make them buy two plots for this sucker. I'll be damned to hell before I let some dude's coffin spill over into my final resting place.

]]> By: SquarePeg http://www.theawl.com/2009/07/this-is-why-youre-dead-and-hard-to-fit-into-a-coffin#comment-13261 SquarePeg Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:09:26 +0000 http://www.theawl.com/?p=7317#comment-13261 Please. Anyone can have a "community" these days. Also, it only takes three losers in a basement with internet access to constitute a "subculture" these days. Please. Anyone can have a "community" these days. Also, it only takes three losers in a basement with internet access to constitute a "subculture" these days.

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