The Pride, Part Five: Of Mojitos and Monogamy

The Pride

INT. OMAR’S APARTMENT, LIVING AREA

OMAR, MARK, and GREG enter from Omar’s bedroom. “Be My Boyfriend” by Offer Nissim is playing on the stereo. Stephen and Eric are drinking blueberry-ginger mojitos near the stereo. THE LESBIAN CHORUS is on the balcony watching the Pride Parade on Fifth Avenue.




OMAR [walking briskly toward the stereo]

What’s wrong with my stereo! It sounds so muddy!


STEPHEN
I think it’s the song.


ERIC
I liked you better in the towels.


MARK
Don’t insult our Baby Gap tees!


OMAR
[mock slapping MARK] Gap Kids! [to STEPHEN] What’s that tasty-looking drink and where’s mine?


STEPHEN
Just a little something I whipped together in that sparse kitchen of yours. Let me go make more.


STEPHEN bounds toward the Kitchen Area and MARK follows. OMAR, GREG, and ERIC remain in the Living Area, near the studio. OMAR makes adjustments to the stereo. The music stops for a moment.


GREG
So what are those bike messengers doing out on the balcony?


ERIC
One, they’re watching the parade or whatever. Two, one of them works with me and is super-smart. And three, they totally heard you.


The song changes to Gerri Halliwell’s “G.A.Y.” as the Camera pans to THE LESBIAN CHORUS. KELLY and JILL remain watching the parade. CORY PHAEUS is turned toward the boys, pointing to her ear and nodding. Pan back to the Living Area.


OMAR
[to GREG] Busted. [to ERIC] New topic. So Scarica, I haven’t seen you two since the housewarming.


ERIC
I know! Things are good, but Stephen is still adjusting to “uptown living.” I think it’s still more “Hell” than “Kitchen” for him right now. I mean, the streets are filled with these tired faggots that we, like, know from years ago, but don’t like, “know,” you know? Not the kind you really want to catch up with.


GREG
Sounds like Facebook friends.


ERIC
Totally Facebook friends. And the food is just so-so, except for this one Chinese fusion place, which is thankfully more Chinese than fusion.


OMAR
And the threeways?


ERIC
Rewd!


GREG
Totally rewd, but true-rewd. Trewd! You two are three-way royalty.


ERIC
Whatever. [Pause.] And if you just have to know, it’s been awful. Trying to get a hottie to come uptown is problem one and and having someone host two is problem two.


GREG
So glad not to have that problem.


OMAR
You won’t be monogamous forever.


GREG
I think we will. We keep each other sexually exhausted.


OMAR
I don’t think Mark is sexually exhaustable.


GREG
Well, maybe you couldn’t. Never mind! [toward the kitchen area] Where’s Piggy’s drink, bitches?


OMAR
[hushedly to GREG] One of these days, I’m going to …


ERIC
[to the returning MARK and STEPHEN] Just in time! It was starting to get hot in here!


The music changes to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)” and the faces of ALL come alive.



NEXT WEEK: EX-PLOSION


Rod Townsend exists to make the messiahship of Jesus an unavoidable issue to our Jewish people worldwide. “The Pride” is his first screenplay.