I don't care what you wear while being arrested, as long as you conduct yourself with dignity throughout the rest of your life, and kindly spare us from ever again having to look upon something like this.
Also, wear loafers. Because YOU DON'T GET YOUR SHOELACES BACK. Have you ever tried to replace a pair of shoelaces? Like, really replace them so they even remotely resemble the ones that came with the shoes?
Spent an afternoon in a county jail orange jumper once and it was 3 SIZES too small. VERY AWKWARD.
I was a 'short timer' in a holding cell with a trio of assault repeat offenders looking at years. Have you ever clutched a plastic ashtray as your only means of self defense with your back to wall on the top bunk? Seriously, I gave them my salt and pepper packets from lunch but apparently that bought me no good will.
I do recommend jorts and hoody as a timeless look to be arrested in. Also- for don'ts, if you're black I would suggest not living in a yellow house, even if it's a Victorian with a wraparound porch. The polo with slacks however, will give you the professorial air that is key to holding court and getting respect in any lock-up.
I'm wearing shorts in the office right now. The tear-away kind. We're going to have a vigorous capture the "flag" game, and guess who's the Jolly Roger? Arrrr.
Hell, Balk, of course you can wear shorts! If shorts are good enough for officers in the British Army in tropical climates, they're good enough for you.
I've been many more places, seen more sickening things, and faced far greater dangers than you ever will in your cushy Manhattan existance, and I'm wearing shorts right now.
I know this because I live in a place where Old Navy is the pinacle of male fashion but I'm pretty sure those are the 11" plain front linens the store is selling this summer, which, if true, means he was bankin' all that cash.
His t-shirt reads "Property of Ridgefield Police" - was he arrested shirtless?
perhaps he was trying to enter a 7-11 with no shirt or shoes, and demanding service?
Now compare the weak kneed, milquetoast bulges of felons today to the manly bulges of yore.
http://www.boingboing.net/2009/07/22/seeking-john-dilling.html
No wonder no-ones getting any these days.
I think I have changed my mind. I would prefer to be arrested in pants. (Also prefer not to be arrested.)
I don't care what you wear while being arrested, as long as you conduct yourself with dignity throughout the rest of your life, and kindly spare us from ever again having to look upon something like this.
Stop me if you've heard this: two mayors, two state assemblymen, five rabbis, and a kidney salesman walk into a bar. A panda wearing undershorts plants fast-growing bamboo shoots under their seats and buys them all a round, insisting they have a round of pousse cafés on him....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pousse-café
Also, wear loafers. Because YOU DON'T GET YOUR SHOELACES BACK. Have you ever tried to replace a pair of shoelaces? Like, really replace them so they even remotely resemble the ones that came with the shoes?
I think jumpsuits are best for the early-morning perp-walk.
Spent an afternoon in a county jail orange jumper once and it was 3 SIZES too small. VERY AWKWARD.
I was a 'short timer' in a holding cell with a trio of assault repeat offenders looking at years. Have you ever clutched a plastic ashtray as your only means of self defense with your back to wall on the top bunk? Seriously, I gave them my salt and pepper packets from lunch but apparently that bought me no good will.
Good luck Bernie!
I do recommend jorts and hoody as a timeless look to be arrested in. Also- for don'ts, if you're black I would suggest not living in a yellow house, even if it's a Victorian with a wraparound porch. The polo with slacks however, will give you the professorial air that is key to holding court and getting respect in any lock-up.
http://worldofwonder.net/2009/07/20/Just_the_thing/
The hoody puts it over the top. I could do yard work in that.
Is... is that Gavin McInnes?
Which is why I throw on a double-breasted suit coat when opening the door to get the paper.
Was he mowing the lawn when he was arrested?
It's nice to know you're Awlways only one ad-click away from "follow us on Twitter and win a Fistlet!"
http://www.nvmber9.com/store/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=9
I'm wearing shorts in the office right now. The tear-away kind. We're going to have a vigorous capture the "flag" game, and guess who's the Jolly Roger? Arrrr.
Hell, Balk, of course you can wear shorts! If shorts are good enough for officers in the British Army in tropical climates, they're good enough for you.
I've been many more places, seen more sickening things, and faced far greater dangers than you ever will in your cushy Manhattan existance, and I'm wearing shorts right now.
Are you hot and sweaty? Then, wear the shorts.
Jeeze.
I know this because I live in a place where Old Navy is the pinacle of male fashion but I'm pretty sure those are the 11" plain front linens the store is selling this summer, which, if true, means he was bankin' all that cash.