Is this the kind of thing that you're supposed to pray to God to alleviate? Because, honestly, I am pretty much willing to do anything at this point. FUCKING RAIN.
Friday, June 19, 2009
17
It's nice and sunny in the awesome southern flyover country. Plus it's so damn hot everyone has gone into summer hibernation, which involves big air-conditioned bars and all-day whiskey and tequila binges beginning promptly with a big Mexican breakfast at about 9am. Come on down. You'll hate the geography and the people, but on the plus side, you won't remember any of it.
But it's going to be sunny in the Hamptons right? Right? Somebody? C'mon, I paid a fortune for this share.
AHA! It's YOUR fault.
Yay! Weather on the Ones was due for a comeback!
God is clearly punishing me for my porn habit. I apologize to the Eastern United States for the collateral suffering.
I thought it was for inserting more fart jokes into Last Year at Marienbad.
Babies. You know that line in "MacArthur Park," "Someone left the cake out in the rain"? Yeah? Well that was not written about New York City. New York doesn't need good weather anyway because New York has things and places and people and doings. Jesus, I'd have to wear sunscreen if I moved back just to get around at night. Anyway, let me just re-iterate what the guy in the next cubicle would have said to you about four times a day since the rain started if you had a job where you worked in an office: "Someday a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the streets."
If one more of my Facebook "friends" writes "Rain rain go away..." as their update I swear I'm totally going Travis Bickle on them.
I'm going Delta Burke so there...
If this weather fucks up my garlic harvest I'll be pissed. On the plus side, the favas are liking it.
Seeing that weather map makes me feel glad the NYC area frogs and turtles aren't the only ones enjoying all this moisture.
I sacrificed a puppy this morning on your behalf, Balk, hence the sunshine (well, it's more like glare, but at least it ain't rain). Hope you feel OK about that.
I SAW THE SUN TODAY!! For like five minutes. It was fun.
Reporting from Chicago: 10:47 a.m., and it is PITCH BLACK here. Unless I find my flashlight soon, I'll never be able to locate John Cusack.
Montreal, 12:29: People angrily curl up their fists and gallicly curse at the heavens: 'Merde! C'est quoi l'affaire?'
Or - Merde, il pleut!
Sorry, the high school french just kicked in.
Looks like a frame from http://www.theawl.com/2009/06/marco-brambillas-civilization