Recession Battering Nation's Titty-Jiggling Trade
It's tough all over, and even the hooter-shaking industry is not immune: America's strip clubs are seeing slower sales as customers focus more on the actual boobs in front of them rather than the high-end food and drink that once helped inflate profits. "In order to adapt," reports the Wall Street Journal, "many so-called gentlemen's clubs are shedding their upscale trappings and catering to a thriftier clientele by offering less expensive drinks, waiving cover charges and refocusing their marketing."
Seeking a "broader, more blue-collar market," several large strip club chains are focusing less on Kobe beef and expensive cigars in favor of "bring-your-own" promotions, theme nights (the theme is usually "tits") and more nude nude totally nude action.
Still, it's not completely bad news: "Amid the hard times, club owners say they have found some benefits. Several report that it's easier to hire 'exotic dancers' now that many women are being laid off from more buttoned-down, white-collar jobs. Among the new recruits at Rick's and VCG are a laid-off paralegal, a laid-off fashion designer, a Bank of America banker, a former paralegal and two Los Angeles real estate agents." And they all really like you.
Heh. Hard times.
HA!
You can't put many quarters in a g-string.
"a laid-off paralegal, a laid-off fashion designer, a Bank of America banker, a former paralegal and two Los Angeles real estate agents."
so in other words, they're running a totally nude learning annex?
Like Mediabistro, but different. Unlike Laurel Touby, hey're ONLY wearing boas.
Heh, a BOA boa.
The Topless Donut Shop in Vassalboro, ME, is basically way ahead of them. Even after having their building burned down by local arsonists who thought they were sinners.
I had to see if this were true. Yes!
http://www.boston.com/news/local/maine/articles/2009/06/04/topless_coffee_shop_destroyed_in_arson_fire/
Hee hee. Imagine making a banker dance for crumpled dollars. They should advertise her former profession.
She'll make up for it with the bonus
I go to the naked McDonald's, where I can eat a Big Mac off the stomach of a naked fry cook.
I can also attest the caliber of strippers has taken the same downturn (time to get that degree!). After being dragged to a Vegas club on a work trip I swear one of the ladies had recently shuttered a dry cleaners.
Times are hard. I had a pair of NIB pink Dolce & Gabbana stilettos up on EBay for $99 and no takers. I thought the *ahem* dancers would snap those up, but who can compete with $35 lucite platforms?
Damnit. I'm going to miss the lobster Thermidor at New York Dolls.