On behalf of all of us here at The Awl, I wanted to ask Ken Layne, proprietor of Wonkette, some questions about how to run a website, and also about the politics, which he supposedly knows about. And about how the world is flat, and how bad that last fake "Star Wars" movie was. Also the hobos in our neighborhood. So we did it on video! (PLEASE NOTE: It takes a second to buffer. PLEASE NOTE: Please don't be horrified by The Awl's offices. ALSO: I am an idiot.) Anyway, it's just like BLOGGING HEADS, but half as long and with slightly more cursing, and with more drinking and smoking. We like to call it: Talking Hats. (But we are open to suggestions.)
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
56
"But when Layne didn't return our emails, I called in a favour from my college buddy, Woolly Willy"
As for an alternate title, howsabout "Choire Will Shoehorn Cats Into Every Facet of this Site"?
Ken talks like Seth Rogen a bit.
Oh, I'm sure the only reason that traffic is terrible is that the employed are now not and aren't killing other people's time, or the self-employed like me are scared to death and actually spending time on the web drumming up work.
But we think of you often, really.
Layne's flesh-colored (nude we used to say)t-shirt is disturbing.
It's ORANGE, a robust ORANGE. That is only flesh colored if yr Charlie Crist.
Must be a Valentino.
You should turn off your harsh overhead flourescent lights and instead do mood lighting like Choire.
I thought you were tan.
I thought it was bare skin at first. It looked like you were wearing your shirt unbuttoned. With the tinted glasses it was quite a look. My first reaction was surprise, like: "Wow. Ken Layne is kind of cheesy. Who knew?" But it just seemed wrong. Very wrong. So I had a closer look and realized that there was a t-shirt.
And now you say that it is "robust."
Thinking about this makes me feel dirty.
Which makes me think that you and Choire should do the interview bare-chested from now on.
Ken, I've decided you're bear hot.
I just now finished this. I'm pretty sure that's not a t-shirt.
Yes, Ken, but we all have a sneaking suspicion it hides a neck beard.
Now how am I supposed to read that?
Stop Making Sense?
TOUCH IT.
How We Look Now
So, you know, ah, you dudes might want to place a time limit on this. Just sayin.
I disagree. I like organic conversation between people I like.
So my suggestion would be to record it just like that and be unopposed to editing.
2 minutes dudes. 2 minutes.
2 minutes. 2 dudes. 2 cents.
(2 cups)
Can we call it "Talking Beards"?
What Is Up With My Hair
as long as you eat chips during every interview, i'm good.
My favourite part is 3:24, when Choire fixes his hair. It's like the one time in my life I had a manicure, and I couldn't get any work done because I was too busy looking at the pretty colours on my nails while I typed.
genius cat-upsmanship.
This was strangely hypnotic.
That was shorter than 'Solaris'!
Anything is shorter that "Solaris."
Wow.
Yeah. MONETIZE THAT.
You just watch. He will. Next time you do one of those, you get a Butterfinger Buzz thrown at your dome every time you make an Insidery.
choire's camera has like a red zit on the upper right corner. how gauche.
Please, never do this again.
That was highly agreeable, and my first exposure to an extended Choire. The reaction shots are very Chaplinesque.
They definitely still make Almond Roca. I used to think it was delicious. Maybe not anymore.
My suggestion for next week's topic is this: Why intelligent people who work for a living, don't do drugs, and have banished all impure thoughts, don't have 30 minutes or so to plop down in front of their computers and watch shit like this.
Weren't either of you worried about catching the Novel Flu (aka the Swine Flu)being so close?
Has no one told you about the "up the nose" angles?
Take charge, people!
It's good you're here.
And framing - this is not the pan & scan "Pillow Talk" methinks....
It would be cool if next time you try to merge your heads together so we see half and half. Then you could stick your tongues out and be all sexy.
You know, I think we could morph all this into a site where our personas are presented online by our pets. Presenting Pithy Pet Perspectives on Current Events.
Like, for example, I have a female cat? But we all call him "he"? He's a guy but he's a girl? But a cat, so you stop questioning it after a while and just accept that you've been sucked into some weird and really wrong psychodrama?
Jeez. The video's still going. Fill, Karen. Think of a cat joke.
Today We Both Showered
Karen: Oh, Lola....
I thoroughly enjoyed that. More please!
I think it should be called "Talking Cats", actually.
You're both so...normal. Don't know why I expected anything else really. I'm a bit shattered but I will deal. I still look forward to the next tete a tete; no editing or time restraints, boys. Realtime and raw is best.
WAIT STOP CHOIRE'S CAT HAS A BEAUTY MARK?!?!?!
I'm going with above, that shirt was too flesh colored, I missed the first 5min trying to figure out "what was up with that". Then I thought, damn this is a slow download, before figuring out it's toooo long. Good conversation though (one time deal, shorter next time).
I came for Balk, but I'm falling in love with Choire.
Fell asleep to this through my hayfever, and had dreams of Barstow all night. Never have someone murumur, "hour and a half northeast of Lancaster," while you're drifting off unless you want to wake up at 4 a.m. shrieking like a dying bunny with the faint aftertaste of blood, whiskey, gasoline, and Jamba Juice.
We'll Make Out Next Time, Promise
or: Watch This To Add Specificity To Your Choire Sex Dreams
I am happy that everyone else has 37 minutes to spare here... I just don't.
Can you do a highlights reel?
I really enjoyed this.
GRAVATAR IS THE FUTURE!